Birth Professionals Who Use The Words ‘My Ladies’

Why do I dislike the use of the phrase ‘My Ladies’ so much?

I think it’s the suggestion of possession, that some how the midwife has ownership of the pregnant women they care for. It under cuts a woman’s autonomy; they already have all the power they need inside to birth well.

‘Ladies’ is a deferential term that historically men have used towards the ‘weaker sex’, we should drop it, along with every other term of endearment like , love, dear and babe.

Every pregnant woman we meet is an expert on her own body and experience. She may not know anything about the structures that we’ve imposed on birth; She might not know anything about the imaginary measurements we have invented for this mysteriously unfolding birthing story, but she is an expert when it comes to responding to her body.

She wants some support, she may need some gentle pointing and directing to her inner capacity for birthing.

What she doesn’t need is an ‘expert’ suggesting that the power to birth is out-side in .


4 thoughts on “Birth Professionals Who Use The Words ‘My Ladies’

  1. Not sure I agree with this Mark. Women often say “my midwife”. It is not possession, just an expression of the often beautiful, family like relationship between a midwife and the woman she is supporting.
    As for the term “lady”, this surely is just a polite description of a woman, just as “gentlemen” politely deceived a man. .
    Have we not gone too far with political correctness? Do we really all have to walk the tightrope of fearing to cause offence every time we open our mouths.
    I for one, am happy to be described as as a lady and the women on my caseload quite enjoy being ” mine”.

  2. ….for me language isn’t important, it’s foundational, the words we use shape our and others experience….words give a chance to ‘point’ is a direction…..

    Political correctness in many ways is just offering us a direction for our meaning making….my adopted son once upon a time would have been labeled a ‘half cast’ then later, ‘mix race’ and for now the PC reference is ‘dual heritage’……for me I much prefer ‘dual heritage’….I’m sure it will evolve even more. Stop, and think about how you experience the different words, they ‘feel’ different don’t they?

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