I’ve seen hundreds of women give birth and at a certain time, as her cervix, the opening to her uterus, has opened to about ten centimetres (more pseudo measurement, of course this not measured with a ruler), her body starts to experience feeling that feel like she wants to open her bowels, often a woman will say she desperately needs the toilet, the urge to bear down, like she is passing a massive stool. This feeling is so very intense and out of her control, the process of involuntary pushing signals that you are both in the home straight, her body is pushing on its own, she’s has no control over it. I’ve watched women again and again as a kind of wave comes over them, suddenly being completely out of control stimulates the four F response and the baby’s birth is edging closer. In that moment every cell in your masculine body will cry out…..FIX HER! But your mission remains the same, connect, be there, strong, intimate, offering limited words that reinforce you presence and love, it sounds like melodramatic wank, but this way of being is warrior like, she will get your strength, and the ‘earth’ in you will be broken as the foundations for sacrificial loving fatherhood are laid.